Night and Day

Everything is Spinning, the World is whirling around.

Awkward and Silent, my feet firmly on the ground.

Perfectly Still, and quiet I sit, only considering the Silence to vent.

Bitterness burns with acidic fires, reminding time, is not for buyers.

Eyes tightly shut, as darkness clouds in, how I wish I could begin again.

Without warning the darkness fades, leaving only a warmth on my face.

A shining light, in my darkest fight, a new day, an end to night. 

Everything Changes...

        I feel as though I have been standing still and time lapse is occurring all around me. Life is in constant motion and goes forward each day. I always feel like if only I could close my eyes and press pause for a second then I could deal with the flood of issues we daily face. Maybe I would show more grace and generosity if I could truly ponder each response to each action. My children, though still little seem to be aging every moment... and my reflection reminds me that I also have added days since I last truly looked at myself. Above all else time is valuable... It cannot be purchased or traded for... its a constant in a inconstant world. I dare to say that at 25 soon to be 26 I still feel like I am finding myself. Maybe that will never change... I hope it doesn't. I keep reminding myself to breath as life floods in all around me.
       Does anyone know me? How can they if I do not even know myself? Am I the person I was when I was 8 and walked the dirt roads barefooted with my best friend? Possibly, I am the person who waited in the halls for my boyfriend to get out of class... always with butterflies? The person who walked the college halls feeling without purpose and without peace? Possibly the girl who loved the sound of a tiny beating heart and finally began to see what life looked like for the first real time? Every moment of my existence has propelled me forward to this moment of question. Who am I?              Standing still as the life I have ticks by and being filled with wonder? What are the desires and passions that are locked so deeply inside of me? Change is unavoidable... and time is not certain.. but love always is... Perhaps this is why above all we are to love each other deeply. Love covers a multitude ... like the rain washing away the heat and dirt of the day. To be saturated in the coolness and the freshness of love. While I still don't understand who I am I do know who I want to be. Someone that Loves... Someone that Forgives... Someone that Changes.... Someone that is unafraid.