Kenzi Faye

Well it has been a very very busy month or two for us!! I have not had the time to spare to blog and honestly miss it! Somehow getting to sit by myself for 5-10 min can reset my mommy brain :)!!! 

        On April 24, 2014 we welcomed our sweet little tee tiny daughter into the world. She was 7 pounds and 9 ounces and the smallest little thing I have ever seen!! She is absolutely the most adorable girl I have ever laid eyes on.  Labor was a breeze haha ... no really I was smiling and laughing and just enjoying time with family. 



She came out at 5:18 that evening and has had her daddy and I wrapped around that tiny little finger ever since !! There is absolutely nothing in this world like holding a new baby!! Especially a baby that is your baby! After two boys and lots of prayer the Lord finally gave me a daughter! He not only blessed me with a daughter .... BUT he also made her beautiful :) I am so so so in love with her!! Every little inch is precious right down to her teeny tiny baby toesies !! 
This entire past month has been one giant blur !!!! Been so super busy I haven't had time for anything!! There are nights when I think i might cry from being so exhausted but then I look at her and fall in love all over again. Only for a very very short time will she be this small... I keep reminding myself to soak it all in. I was grateful to have my mom and mother in law around for help prior to her birth and for a week after :). My grandmother whom she was named after was also present at the birth (She cried which was so sweet to me !). We also had Aunt Audrey drive 5 hours just to meet her! I couldnt ask for a better best friend!

Its been a terrible day....SO I NEEDED TO POST SOMETHING GOOD :) ( HINTS Kenzi's Birth) ..... from screaming children... to getting locked out of my house .... to grocery shopping with 3 babies.... its been one of those days!!! THE DAYS that make you want to curl up in a ball in the floor... not my floor of course because its still covered in the sticky, crummy yucky things that appear the moment Im done mopping! If my house smells like urine right now its because my beautiful little Kymbrel is becoming a man :) He has discovered that ripping your undies (diaper) off and running around BUTT NAKED yelling is loads of fun! Also, why pee in the potty when there is a whole house!?? ... YESTERDAY he peed in the hallway and him and Candon both repeatedly fell in the pee while trying to run from each other which led to a complete and utter MELT down! Of course all of this falling and rolling around in Pee happened before bath time.... just KIDDING they had just had baths and were clean. Seriously SMH they go from clean to covered in URINE in about 10 seconds. STORY OF MY LIFE! All of this chaos has been happening while Caleb has been at work of course.... He is working a lot of over time so he is tired ... Im tired ... my kids are tired. WE ALL NEED A GOOD NAP I THINK!! This last month has been CrAzY to say the least but... its my life and all the offenders are the ones I love the most!! SOMEONE recently said that I (meaning me) made poor choices in marrying so young against others advice and having kids while not being financially VIABLE.... (we are financially stable now but havent always been.... who hasnt had a hard times? !!) .... that statement has stuck in my mind these past few days.... the absolute cruelty behind the words.

I AM SO THANKFUL FOR ALL MY SO CALLED BAD CHOICES AND MISTAKES!!! I MARRIED AN AMAZING MISTAKE.... And I ADORE ALL THREE OF MY BAD CHOICES !!! 

I love you Caleb, Candon, Kymbrel and little Miss K!!! You guys are my entire world!! I knew even when others didnt.... and even when they didnt agree .... where I was meant to be. Love you little Monsters!

ALMOST forgot these precious pictures :)

Blue Eyed Thieves

When my children were born... they immediately stole my heart! I never imagined that I would never get it back again!

    Its been a busy couple of days, mostly busy for everyone else. I have had to be on bed rest a tad for Kenzi's misbehavior =) . Sitting around doing nothing is a lot harder than you would think! As much as I hate cleaning and laundry I must say I have my  "OWN" way of doing it and though he tried, hubby didn't cut it. Seriously he has done a fantastic job taking care of all of us!! Moments like these really remind me of all the reasons I fell in love with him to begin with. Nothing like your best friend dropping everything to help you with anything you need. Now the kids have had to eat a tad differently but they haven't seemed to mind. =) "daddy always gives us snacks.." Candon is very helpful when I ask what they have ate lol!
       
    Went on a photo shoot today and enjoyed it so much more than a normal person should. I honestly have missed work and having a outlet! It was a maternity session and although it was only 40 min long some of the photos will prolly remain in my mind for years to come. (I will post a few) I love to see a couple that loves each other!! Even though Im sure he didn't notice me noticing I could see the care with every look he gave her! Something amazing about seeing a man in love with his wife.... especially when she is carrying their life inside of her. With every step and instruction he was there making sure she was being careful and already protecting the life that has yet to be born. It was just precious... that's all I know to say !  

Just the kindness and love Caleb has shown me this week has been just beautiful. We get so caught up in our day to day and hurry up life, that I sometimes forget how much I need to see love versus just hearing it. I fell in love with a blue eyed boy who stole my heart and had no idea the amount of love I would have for 2 more blue eyed boys... I love them with all my heart and I feel so lucky to be his wife and their mama!

" I Fell In Love With 3 Blue Eyed Thieves .... They Stole My H

eart .... And I Will Never Get It Back...."

Cry Out to Jesus

Today I can tell that I am being tested. No its not my children today... as often as they test and try me today they are being precious. 
    
As the rain continues to fall at my house I feel a sadness that I can not seem to shake. For the past few days, certain events have left me homesick but, that's not the origin of my sadness today.  Although I may be miles away from family and friends its not the cause of my tears today.
   
     Have you ever loved someone or something so much that their pain becomes your own? I have always had this ability from a young age to feel what others are feeling. Sometimes I do not even know the story behind it or who they are... its just a feeling I get. A feeling I think the Lord allows me to get.... I have truly never understood it but never the less its very present in my life.
    
    On the days like today I really seem to think of random songs that play in my head just to keep the darkness out. Different pieces that I keep thinking of are "Cry out to Jesus.... Break my heart for what breaks yours.... I am redeemed, you set me free... there's a end to the suffering... AND a hope that never fades..." I know my mind rambles often like me :) .
    

    Something that is a true desire of our heart doesn't need to be changed or altered to fit into your life. If its a true desire then its already at the fullest and most concentrated that it can be. Do not water it down or dilute it with the thoughts of conforming it to the world we live in today. A true desire will be exactly that ... a 100% honest raw truth of your heart. When you change it to make it fit... you lose hope in parts of that desire to accommodate the other parts.... God did NOT say "I will give you the desires of your heart once you make them more like what the doctors say your reality is"... GOD said "Delight yourself in the Lord,

and he will give you the desires of your heart." He said I WILL .... not Maybe I can or hopefully but that HE WILL give us the desires of our hearts. 

                             "Your desire is what you long for, what or whom you long to be with. 

Your desire is where your heart is. Your desire is your greatest treasure 

and will be your reward."

"For where your treasure is there your heart will be also."

Matthew 6:21

    

Im not saying you'll get what you want because you want it bad enough... A desire of the heart is different from a desire of the flesh. You must also have a desire for the Lord in your heart. "For He satisfies the longing soul, And fills the hungry soul with goodness."

    

    What are you longing for?? What is it that your soul is starving for?? What is the true desire of your heart??

Not what you think is possible but, what you think is impossible?? 

"But Jesus looked at them and said, “With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.”

                                                                        ALL THINGS ARE POSSIBLE  

                              "But if we hope for what we do not see, we wait for it with patience."

                                                                                                                         Romans 8:25

To my dear friend whom I love so much.... just know that the Lord knows your heart. He hears your cries and is not blind to the pain you feel. He knows what your soul is starving for and he knows exactly the goodness to fill it with. I have faith that the Lord WILL give you the desires of your heart. There is no doubt in my mind... Trust in him... invest your heart and soul into him. Let go of what the world says and "Cry out to Jesus."

I now have a Pre-Schooler

   Candon finally started Pre-school (Homeschool) and he absolutely loves it! Today was his 2nd day and he just soaked up every moment of it. Even on only day 2 I can feel God directing me in which way to go and how to speak so Candon can understand. I honestly have always had this huge fear of teaching because its such a huge responsibility. I mean, I do not want my kids to be viewed badly all because of my failures, but I feel like even though that fear is still present its no longer dominating in my life. Its strange to say that I feel Gods presence more during home school than any other part of my day. I have a calm and a peace and a true desire to be patient and just watch and learn with Candon. I know.. I know its just Day 2 BUT, I am telling you there is just something so comforting about it. I can not tell you that we are not going to have challenging days in the future because I know we will but, I feel like this is God saying to me "Be faithful and trust in me." Im trusting Lord and Im so honored to be this little boys mama!!
    Just in two days Candon has learned what a big "A" and a little "a" is all about. He has learned about the number 1 and also about how God created everything. We have had a few laughs also ... He is already pretty smart about colors, animals, shapes, numbers, and letters so when he seen a alligator that represented the letter "A" he just could not understand that it wasn't a crocodile!! Also, the Ark looks more like a log to him -hahaha!! So he calls is a "Ark boat Log" -Hey I'll take it lol!! Another funny problem we are having is the picture of earth... He calls it a planet, which is 100% right but it messes him up when he does his memory verse =) "God made the heaven and planet" =) 
    All in all Homeschooling seems like its going to be such a wonderful adventure and a joy.  Though, I know there will be obstacles and so called "rainy days"... I have faith that the Lord will bring us though it because I feel this is a calling in my life. 

" And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been 
called according to his purpose."
                                                                                                                     -Romans 8:28
       

 In other News =) this last weekend has been so busy and yet once again, it looks like nothing has been done around here. I have cleaned I know the same things 3 times and still looks messy lol. Doctor visits, 
church, homeschool, and all the normal day to day task have just worn me 
out!!! 
    Kenzi was doing fantastic last dr visit and will be here before we know it!!! I am so excited to have a 
daughter!!! I cleaned out my car yesterday and decided we should try to place 
all 3 car seats in the car to make sure they all fit ... well they didn't =( . UGH so now in the next 12 weeks I have to find another vehicle. I mean, Im excited because I wanted something bigger but at the same time I 
do not want a bigger payment..... just hopeless lol bigger car=bigger payment. She is already expensive and she isn't even here yet =) oh well... Im sure once she is here and those sweet little bows are placed in her hair her daddy will be hooked!! <3 Next Dr visit is in 3 weeks and I will hopefully have some 4d photos to share !!! 

                                                                                        Stay tuned!!

Daddys BUTT Cake

 SOOOO My man has been out of town for 4 days this week and I absolutely hate it!! I have never in my entire life missed him soooooo much!! So I came up with a plan to never ever let him leave again lol!! Not by making him stay but by making him want to stay.... through FOOD :) . Someone posted this beautiful but easy BUNT cake recipe this morning on FB and that's all it took!!
    Loading up the kids and headed to get Bunt cake items..... Candon on the way decides he wants to know what we are shopping for... Candy?? Toys?? Movies?? We are going to make your Daddy a Bunt cake!! He starts laughing hysterically ...after about 2 min of non stop giggles he finally reveals the energy behind the giggles... "Daddy eats BUTT CAKE!!" .... and yet again burst into laughter!! 
    Nothing like having your 3 year old 100% tickled about BUTT CAKE!!! After the long days and the sadness of missing my husband and them missing their daddy it sure was nice to giggle awhile!! I know this is short but sometimes the best moments are... JUST SHORT AND SWEET.... kinda like Candon and Kymbrel!!

"A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones."
                                                                                                             Proverbs 17:22
                                                                                                           

LINK to RECIPE :) http://chocolatechocolateandmore.com/2013/01/strawberries-and-cream-bundt-cake-using-jell-o/

Crayola and Hunks

    So last night after a year of trying to decide I finally broke down and ordered my very first set of homeschool books. Candon will be starting pre-school as soon as they arrive! 
    So naturally when school starts you have to go get "Supplies"!! I mean we obviously cant color with dull crayons, or markers that no longer have tips thanks to Kymbrel's "bite on everything" hobby! So this morning as soon as both boys were awake I got them dressed and we headed to.... McDonalds!! I had already promised we would go this week and I don't want to make more than one trip out into the real world this week so why not cram it all into one fun filled sticky day!! So after stuffing them to the tip top with sugar and pancakes and allowing them to go nuts in the play place for about an hour.... we headed to the store for the most exciting time of Candon's LIFE!! 
    As soon as I park Candon says " Lets GO get my surprise!! "! ... Oh boy ... He misunderstood me, how in the world am I going to turn this one around? So I say " Yay lets go get your surprise supplies"! HAHA 
    Once we hit the school supply aisle he finally got the picture and to my surprise was so excited. It could be that the aisles were decorated with huge fresh packs of crayons and markers.... that had never been exposed to Kymbrel's baby wrath, or maybe it was the rainbow assortment of glitter and glue that caught his eye and made him think " this is awesome". I let him basically pick whatever he wanted as long as it wasn't Rose Art lol!! If there is one thing I can remember from my coloring days is that Rose Art stinks! How they even still sell crayons is just a plain shock to me. IM SERIOUS!  So he is running up and down the aisle laughing and then something catches his eye.... "LOOK mama its the HUNK!!!"! Yeah its all cute in all except just so happens that we were standing by two really big muscle men... You know the kind that look like they could eat small children for dinner! OF course they turn around all like "Yeah hey little man"! Meanwhile my face is on fire and I instantly say "HULK honey... not Hunk he is from the Avengers". All is taken care of and then Candon blurts out " They look like Hulks ... but not green"! HAHA Well what do you do? I just decided to laugh and try to walk away as quickly as I could....
    Kymbrel during this whole supply raid seemed to be behaving himself. I was completely absorbing all of Candon's "ohhhh and ahhhh" moments so I just didn't notice why he was being so precious and sweet! I look up and someone has found himself a bag of M&Ms!! They must have been in the diaper bag from their trip to Granna and Paw Paws house.... Because what do grandparents think are travel necessities?? Diapers, Wipes, goldfish and of course you cant ever send them back to their mother without a bag of candy! SOOO he was basically a beautiful little rainbow of chocolate and colored candy from head to toe! Hims just a little precious baby who was being sooooo good!
    So we finally reach the end of shopping for school supplies and thank goodness because it was NAP time!! 

    All in all it has been a very fun day! Getting to see Candon so excited about learning and preschool really got me excited about teaching it! I know what society still thinks about homeschooling "its a awful, terrible, sheltering, non social experience"... but that's just not the case! My husband and sister in law were home schooled up until high school and  I can still see the impact that it had on their lives. They were still just as social if not MORE social. Both of them are extremely smart and fell right into place with others their age... and most important... They both had a SOLID foundation to stand on. I am thankful for their experiences and that they had such an amazing mom and teacher! I was public schooled my whole life and was no where near sheltered... I wish I had been sheltered a little more! I could have used a little more Jesus and a little less social time.  I'm not saying its the right choice for everyone but it just happens to be the right choice for me and my family as of now. We have planned on homeschooling since before we had children. It is just something the Lord placed on our hearts, and its something that we want to be faithful in attempting! I look forward to the many memories that will be made through this process. I am so excited and absolutely blessed to be able to be in the position I am. 

"Start children off in the way they should go, and even when they are old they will not turn from it."
                                                                                                                                                 ~ Proverbs 22:6

1st Blog EVER!!

Well... I have decided to become a blogger... obviously haha

    Honestly, I am a stay at home mom that lives 5 hours from friends and family so I need this time to be able to vent about all the good bad and ugly things that go on in my life! Going all day long with no adult conversation can be really damaging... I mean, seriously! Just think about it... When was the last time that someone said "Excuse me, do you know which way the rest room is ?" and you reply with " The potty is right over there, my 3 year old just had to go  tee tee." Or how about all the little phrases you pick up from your toddler like "Uh oh, bye bye, tee tee, and my favorite bite bite". Before you know it your no longer a functioning adult in society but more like a really big toddler. Even when my children are not around I still find myself saying all of those things. LIKE I SAID DAMAGING!! 

     I love it when family calls to check on us and they always say "Hey how are you today?" and you come back with the "I'm fine doing good." IN reality what's really happening is your 3 year old and 18 month old are doing laps around your feet, screaming at the top of their lungs, and knocking over every clean pile of freshly folded laundry. One is naked and the other one is cold and needs a shirt.... always cups to be refilled... more snacks to hand out.... and no one ever wants a nap! Dishes and Laundry get cleaned on a "as needed" basis!! SO yeah we are "fine."

    Then DADDY comes home and all is right in the world! My home stops spinning long enough for him to wonder why Im still in my pjs? .. why no laundry or dishes got washed?? And how our kids managed to become so naked and dirty that they look homeless?

    BUT somehow I keep having children (don't know what's going on with that!) Even among the chaos and craziness that unfolds in my home on a daily basis there is always love, joy, and so much laughter! I could not imagine a more fulfilling life than the one I live.  I thank God everyday not only for my salvation but for his blessings. My children are among the highest blessings I have ever received! Its Chaos but its Beautiful!! Everyday I get to spend with them is a true gift. 

"Behold, children are a gift of the LORD; The fruit of the womb is a reward." 

Psalm 127:3